Prioritize Us: Unlock Lasting Love with One Simple, Proven Test (The Priority Series)

For partnerships to endure and overcome challenging times, couples must communicate honestly about their priorities and expectations. This open dialogue can bring relief, as it helps prevent conflicts stemming from deeper, unresolved differences in what each partner values most. Personal development coach and educator Nick Brancato shares practical strategies for couples to enhance their collaboration through Prioritize Us: Unlock Lasting Love with One Simple, Proven Test. Drawing from his decades of experience working with individuals and couples, ​the author offers practical tools for couples to identify, understand, and realign their priorities. Among these tools is the Total Difference Score (TDS) system, which measures alignment between partners’ life priorities. According to Brancato, misaligned priorities can create stress, tension, and unmet expectations in relationships, and invites readers to reflect upon their own experiences in their relationship. The exercises invite truthful and candid responses to name values, goals, and priorities.

By aligning priorities, couples can work together on open communication, increasing empathy, and acting intentionally to navigate differences and build a collaborative partnership. Brancato offers valuable tips for improving communication, including regular check-ins and adjustments as life circumstances change to ensure both partners feel seen, heard, and supported. He advocates for regular discussions about priorities, urging partners to listen without judgment and express their needs clearly. ​

One piece of advice that stood out for me is Brancato’s challenge for readers to take communication about priorities a step further by turning priorities into meaningful goals. This process of goal-setting can be empowering, as it provides a clear path for personal and relationship growth. ​In business settings, the SMART goal framework – an acronym for specific, measurable, actionable, relevant, and time-bound – ensures goals are clear and achievable. Readers will learn that they can co-create a balanced, fulfilling relationship by turning priorities into specific, actionable goals and tracking progress.

Successful relationships require willingness from both parties to put in the work of intentional tending and continuous effort. Being married for more than a decade, I found Brancato’s advice relevant and applicable to couples at any stage in their relationship. Any opportunity to learn about each other opens the doors for a greater understanding of what the other person needs to thrive and be whole in the relationship. The book shares discussion prompts that are useful for guiding communication, for example: “Which priority feels most neglected right now?” ​ or “How can we support each other’s top priorities more effectively?” Actionable advice and exercises can help couples navigate conflicts, set meaningful goals, and celebrate progress.

Advice offered in Prioritize Us is organized and designed to be accessible and practical, offering clear and actionable steps​. Brancato’s way of dispensing information is both methodical and supportive, making it easy to follow and apply the concepts. This book can serve as a helpful guide for couples intent on enhancing their connection.